Another year gone by.
Meet me at the lost and found.
I don’t remember when I found myself in the lost and found
Cast aside into a pile on the island of misfit toys.
I spent so much time wearing personalities as masks
Trying to morph into costumes and shapes that just weren’t right
I just wanted to belong somewhere, but I ended up here instead.
Now I’m faced with facing my bare, naked face
To discover who I really am
Sitting in a dim, dusty box at the lost and found.
I wish I could map out the future,
Input the coordinates and discover exactly what’s next
Or that dandelions and birthday candles
Could really make wishes come true.
I want to know the unknown
Or at least what’s around the corner
But the more time I spent on that lonely island
The more I came to recognize my reflection without a mask.
The quirks and traits I had repressed deep down were a pleasant surprise
Like the feeling you get when you find hidden pockets in your clothes
I wondered why I had kept these secrets to myself
Why was I afraid of who I was without a character to play?
I wanted to be like everyone else.
I searched for myself in validation and acceptance from others,
Instead of evolving into my own identity.
But now I’m somewhere between lost and found.
The edges are still fuzzy
Like when you’re clumsily reaching for your alarm in the morning
Half-awake, half-fighting with leftover melatonin.
But clarity comes with time, when the light gets lighter
When the dust gets dusted off
And gathers among the masks instead
When I stop looking for the coordinates for buried treasure
Because you don’t need to dig too deep to find what you’re looking for.
I shouldn’t be afraid of taking the wrong path
If I’m lost, then I’ll be found again one day.
Meet me at my new home, the lost and found.
Let’s be lost and found together.
Happy 23rd birthday to me. I hope I can find the strength to leave negative memories behind, fight my inner demons, and shed the masks I used to live with. Thanks so much for reading and I’ll see you lovelies soon. ❤